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Check Out The Cheater's Checklist
By Geoff Davies, Sat Dec 10th
Ask yourself these questions? Does your partner spend a lot oftime on line? Do they have other email accounts, do they use the computerafter you have gone to bed, have they changed the passwords onyour computer, maybe they delete all incoming e-mails when theyused to accumulate. It's common for a cheating partner to use e-mail to communicatewith their lover. Some of the telltale signs in this categorymay also be an indication of involvement in an on line or cyberaffair. Don't take this lightly. These affairs can be as harmfulto your marriage as the real thing. Though they may not involvesexual contact, the emotional attachment can be extremelystrong, and can quickly progress from cyberspace to physicalreality.
Does your home phone ring and when "you" answer it there's noone there Illicit affairs depend on repeated contact; many of which takeplace by phone. These telltale signs of infidelity arerelatively easy to find. Some people take the risk of callingtheir lovers from home or having their lovers call them at home. Check your partner's mobile phone, look at the call log,incoming, outgoing, missed and deleted calls. Check themessaging, texts in and out and deleted Does your partner have little or no interest in sex? Or havethey changed their sexual habits Be alert for any type of changes in the frequency or the qualityof your sex life together. Most important of all: If you suspectyour partner of having an affair, take steps to protectyourself. Do not put yourself at risk from HIV/AIDS, herpes orother sexually transmitted diseases. Perhaps you find birth-control pills in her medicine cabinet,and you've had a vasectomy or maybe he carries condoms, and youare on the pill. Take a few minutes to look over your partner's car; have theyremoved the kid's stuff or the baby seat? The car can be a rich source of telltale signs. The glovecompartment, car seats (underneath and between), the spare tyrewell, under the sun visor, the ashtray, the side pockets orcompartments, under the floor mats and other nooks and cranniescan reveal a wealth of information .Has the passenger seat inthe car has been moved and is not in the usual position. Dotheir clothes smell different,
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like a lover's perfume oraftershave? Has your partner recently started working late or has to attendlots of late meetings? Business is commonly used as an excuse to account for largeblocks of time away from home. Partners often use their jobs asa cover for extramarital affairs. Your partner's work habitswill undoubtedly change as the affair unfolds. Affairs generally require a considerable amount of time. Thereare only 24 hours in a day; your partner's absences will becomeincreasingly more frequent as they try to steal time from otheractivities. Has your partner changed their style of clothes i.e.: trying tolook younger? People having an affair (or even thinking about having one) willwant to make themselves more attractive. They will begin toenhance his appearance in some way. Be alert for changes inwardrobe, grooming, physical appearance and personal hygiene.These are usually the most visible signs of infidelity. If theyembark on a drastic self-induced makeover, it's probably not foryou. Do they act nervous or fidgety whenever the name of a colleagueor friend of the opposite/same sex is mentioned or talked about?Studies show that we are more likely to have an affair withsomeone we already know, someone that they come into contactwith on a regular basis - a neighbour, a colleague, a familyfriend or business associate. If you're observant, you may beable to determine the identity of your partner's lover by theway they behaves in their presence. Does your partner hide the credit card bills and banksstatements? Affairs cost money. If your partner has a lover,they will want to wine and dine them entertain and buy theoccasional gifts. No matter how carefully they cover their tracks; sooner orlater this will be reflected in the family finances. Stay alertfor financial signs of infidelity. Be especially vigilant around the times of the year when giftsare usually exchanged. During the holidays and various othertimes throughout the year, you may find or cards hiddenaround your home or in the car. Receipts or credit card billsfor may turn up shortly before or after Christmas andValentine's Day. About the author:Geoff Davies is the Webmaster of Infidelity Resources. Pleasevisit his website at www.infidelityresources.co.uk or contacthim at editor@infidelityresources.co.uk
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